Family pressures relative who works in e-commerce company to misuse their work access to grant them favors, relative refuses to help: 'Following their demands would be a career-ending move'

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Sep 21, 2025 7:00 PM EDT

Getting benefits from your workplace is great. Who doesn't love these little perks that make you feel less of a fool for subjecting yourself to the corporate world? Give us all the coupons and discounts you have, please.

The thing about the perks you get is that there will always be someone else who will try to take advantage of them for you. Usually, these people don't even work with you; they just want to benefit from you, whichever way they can.

Take the family in the story below as an example. They all tried to pressure their relative to agree to countless favors, all because of where they worked. They wanted them to pull data, submit a referral, and even their employee discounts. There was no end to their demands. Since the employee was not willing to risk their job, they refused all these demands and even walked out of the family dinner to make a point.

Would you have helped your family members, or do you think it is valid to set these boundaries? Keep scrolling to read the full story and share your thoughts in the comments below.

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  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10555275264
    via GaudiLab

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02

    AITA for walking out after my relatives kept pressuring me to misuse my work access for family favors?

    So last night we had a family dinner. My uncle asked me to pull some data for his marketing team since I'm working for a ecommerce company.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 03
    Also, my aunt persist me to submit a referral for her boyfriend's son. I said the role needs relevant experience and I will not lie.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 04
    I told relatives | would not use my job access for any personal favors. I said no data, no internal documents, no priority referrals.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 05
    Somehow, they also started listing items to buy with my employee discount. I explained policy, conflict rules, and audit trails.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 06
    Moreover, I showed the code of conduct section on my phone. They told me that nobody gets caught and I should help them.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 07
    That dinner was too over for me. So I left the restaurant. They seem to not get my point but i will still follow the rules.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 08
    and I will not attend events where pressure is applied because my job is not a family vending machine.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 09
    I don't like people ask me to break policy since I want to respect my limits and not lose the invitation.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 10
    therdmlife NTA. Doing what they want is a fast way to lose that job, whatever it may be.
    via therdmlife
  • 11
    OP SpruceBear91 Following their demands would be a career-ending move for me. I'm sticking to the rules.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 12
    Business Man Stressed at Work
    via dotshock

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 13
    Vossenoren NTA. That's the behavior of selfish people, who don't appear to care if you could lose your income so they can get what they want from you. If they can't respect a simple "no, I won't do that," they simply don't respect you.
    via Vossenoren
  • 14
    OP SpruceBear91 A firm no isn't negotiable. If they can't respect that, it's their problem, not mine. Boundaries protect me, not them.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 15
    PlanningVigilante > I don't like people ask me to break policy since I want to respect my limits and not lose the invitation. I mean, you could get fired at *best* for misusing company assets. Of course your relatives don't see a down side; there is no downside *for them*. NTA, and leaving is the best option for when people are being pushy about putting your job at risk for their own personal benefit.
    via PlanningVigilante
  • 16
    OP SpruceBear91 My limits and job security come first; their no downside thinking doesn't change that.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 17
    OHRavenclaw NTA. I'm an internal auditor. That's a really good way to lose your job.
    via OHRavenclaw
  • 18
    OP SpruceBear91 Yeah, I'm not risking my career or legal trouble for family favors. Boundaries are non negotiable.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 19
    Princess Bella1 NTA. Ask them if they are going to pay your salary and benefits if you get fired? Because that is what is going to happen if you did what they asked.
    via PrincessBella1
  • 20
    OP SpruceBear91 Exactly!! unless they're willing to cover my salary and benefits if I get fired, it's a hard no. My job and career aren't on the table for favors.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 21
    Avarenda Good. Keep following the rules. It will keep you employed and it will keep you out of jail! It's a win-win!
    via Avarenda
  • 22
    OP SpruceBear91 Exactly! I'd rather keep my job, my integrity, and my freedom than play family favors with work access. Rules exist for a reason, and I'm sticking to them.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 23
    Ma-Hu NTA. Your job isn't worth losing for this.
    via Ma-Hu
  • 24
    OP SpruceBear91 Right??? MY job, my integrity, and my future aren't up for negotiation, even for family pressure.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 25
    Phoenyx_wilson I think there is a massive difference in using employee discount for something and everything else you said. My grandma always used her employment discount so I could buy things I needed, but there was no way I'd ask her to break ethics. NTA good on you for standing up to them because it sounds like if you gave in, they would expect it every time
    via Phoenyx_wilson
  • 26
    OP SpruceBear91 Using my discount responsibly is one thing, but breaking ethics or policy is a hard no. Once I give in, it becomes an expectation.
    via SpruceBear91
  • 27
    seattlekeith NTA. Ask them if they're willing to set aside enough $$ in an escrow account to cover your annual salary (including raises, bonuses, health insurance premiums, stock options/RSUs, 401k match, other employer perks) for the remainder of your working life so you can continue to enjoy the lifestyle you've become accustomed to when you get fired and can't get another equivalent job since your professional reputation has been tarnished for doing something stupid.
    via seattlekeith
  • 28
    OP SpruceBear91 Exactly, unless they're willing to write a check for my entire career, it's not happening. My job, reputation, and future aren't up for grabs for family favors.
    via SpruceBear91

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